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Title: Home
Author: opalmatrix
Warnings: mentions of blood and incest
Pairing(s): Hakkai/Kanan, Hakkai/Gojyo
Spoilers: Hakkai's backstory
Notes: written for saiyuki_time, Challenge #76, Sonnet;; time allowed: 90 minutes; time taken: errrrh, I totally lost track ... somewhere between 60 and 120 minutes, I guess. I'm not completely happy with it - a couple of the lines are pretty twee - but hey. at least it's a sonnet.
Summary: n/a, really


In my first home dwelt my sister, with my father and my mother -
And I remember nothing more: my time there was too brief
Why were we two torn apart, and taken from each other?
Why did our cruel parents choose to give us both that grief?
For years we lived in chilly halls, lone hearts among the crowd
Until we gained our freedom, found each other once again
To vow love was forbidden, yet that is what we vowed
Our shining joy made of us one, where earlier we were twain
But all too soon that flame was dowsed: she was reft from my side
I tried to buy her back with blood, and on that darksome day
I lost my love, my form, my mind: in truth, that night, I died -
Yet love and light came back to me, as life was poured away
Even if the sky's my roof, while at Heaven's whim we roam
As long as I am by his side, I find myself at home.

 

Comments

( 7 comments — leave a comment )
akira17
Apr. 29th, 2010 01:35 am (UTC)
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
so cute
opalmatrix
Apr. 30th, 2010 02:05 am (UTC)


Glad you liked it!

lawless523
Apr. 29th, 2010 12:51 pm (UTC)
Just writing a sonnet is an accomplishment in itself; writing one that fits Saiyuki and makes sense is even better. I particularly like the last two lines.

Congratulations!
opalmatrix
Apr. 30th, 2010 02:08 am (UTC)

Thanks ... I've been feeling remarkably uncreative lately, so I was relieved to actually get through this one! Those lines are pretty satisfactory - I like the two before them as well. But a lot of the rest of it makes me go "meh."

lawless523
Apr. 30th, 2010 03:04 am (UTC)
Keeping to the rhyme and rhythm scheme must be tough. Maybe part of your feeling of unease stems from the artificiality of some of the sentence construction and the old-fashioned nature of a few of the words.
lady_ganesh
May. 1st, 2010 01:35 am (UTC)
Aww.
purpleicicles
May. 1st, 2010 03:41 pm (UTC)
The last two lines are awesome :)
( 7 comments — leave a comment )

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excellent
saiyuki_time
Penis mightier than the gun

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